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Lisa Hochstein Reflects on Season 4 of RHOM: “No Marriage Is Perfect”
The RHOM cast member opened up about sharing the ups and downs of her marriage, as well as her life as a mom, with viewers.
When Season 4 of Peacock’s The Real Housewives of Miami premiered, Lisa Hochstein’s life looked very different from when viewers last saw her. Now a mom of two kids, son Logan and daughter Elle, she candidly discussed the ups and downs in her marriage that took place in between Season 3 (back in 2013) and Season 4 (which premiered on Peacock in late 2021 and is now airing on Bravo). Putting a spotlight on her relationship was a decision Lisa grappled with.
“It wasn’t easy because it’s something that happened so long ago,” she shared with Bravo Insider in an interview back in March, before she recently addressed new headlines about her marriage to Dr. Lenny Hochstein, whom she wed in 2009. As fans learned in Season 4, Lisa shared that he had an emotional affair in between seasons. “So I didn't think I would have to address it. I knew that the show would come back in my heart, but I didn’t know when. So I just wasn’t sure if I would really ever have to address it again. So, that was difficult, having to relive and rehash, and going back and feeling those emotions. And having to put myself back in time wasn’t easy.”
But she knew if she was going to talk about it, she wanted to be the one to do it. “Well, it’s not something I wanted to share initially, because it’s such a private, personal, and embarrassing thing. But, you know, when you sign up for a reality TV show, you have to talk about all aspects of your life. And I understand that’s what I signed up for, so I had to go there. And also, you know, I just felt like it would come out,” she said. “And I would rather it come out on my terms, and me to be the first one to address it, rather than have one of the women or somebody kind of throw it out there or try to, like, catch me off guard... I felt like just talking about it on my terms and when I felt comfortable.”
While there have been new developments since the season started airing, at the time of her March interview, she had this message about relationships: “No marriage is perfect. Everyone goes through ups and downs, and if someone tells you their marriage is perfect, they’re lying. They’re hiding something,” she said earlier this spring. “So I think it’s very brave of me to put it out there.”
In addition to her journey in her marriage, in between Seasons 3 and 4, Lisa became a mom. “A lot has happened throughout, during that hiatus. I mean, I wish a lot of the viewers wanted to see my journey with IVFs and the surrogacy and having the children,” she said, adding more generally about experiencing “ups and downs” and the “roller-coaster ride of life” before the cameras started rolling again.
And while some of this season has been emotional to relive, she noted that sharing her life as a mom has been joyful. “I love it. I actually would like to see more footage. I wish there were some, like, lost footage that I hope they do, like, a lost footage episode, because there are some moments with the kids that I really wanted to see, and that’s important for me to have those memories,” she said.
She continued, “I want people to see that [mom] side of me, ’cause people have misconceptions about me and they think I’m a certain way based on, I don’t know, they might be judging me based on how I look or my Instagram or what our profession is with the Medspa, and plastic surgery. So they might have a misunderstanding about me and who I am. So I would really want people to see that side of me and understand who I am. I think that’s one of the reasons I wanted to come back. I want the viewers to see how we’ve all grown.”
Lisa first became a mom in 2015 when she welcomed Logan via surrogate; she became a mom again in 2019 when Elle joined their family (also born via surrogate). And Lisa revealed how much her world has changed since becoming a mother.
“I mean, [I learned] how much they are just your world. Everything you do from the moment you wake up until the moment you go to sleep is about them. You’re no longer a priority [laughs]. My life is no longer a priority. It’s their life. And I actually knew that before having children, but I guess the most surprising thing is how much I love [them]. Everybody says it’s just [like that], [but] oh my god. It’s your world. You’ll never feel a love like this, and I didn’t understand that until I had my kids, ’cause it’s just this unconditional love that you don’t understand you can have until you have your kids.”
She noted that when it comes to which parent they take after, “they got the best of both worlds.”
“Their personality is a lot like mine. [They’re] outgoing, very talkative, very personable, very smart. And it’s no secret Lenny is, like, a genius. I really feel like they both possess, like, all the best qualities of both of us,” she said.
Which brings us to the million-dollar questions: Would Lisa be OK if her kids watched RHOM back someday? Also, what if they ever wanted to put their lives on reality TV once they’re older?
“They really don’t have too much interest in watching it. Honestly, I’ve tried to show Logan his scene [at] the Sugar Factory. He’s like, ‘Oh, yeah, cool, bye.’ And, you know, they don’t really care. And Els too. So she doesn’t really know what’s going on. She’s like, 'Oh, there’s Mommy, there’s me.’ They don’t understand, nor do I want them to right now, ’cause there’s little things that are, like, they’re too young to understand,” Lisa said.
As for the future, she added, “I mean at that point, they’re going to be so intelligent, emotionally intelligent, and smart, they’re gonna be able to watch it and understand what’s going on. So, no worries about that. They know who their mom is. And they’re surely gonna know when they’re teenagers [laughs]. So, I mean, they’ve already done it [and appeared on TV]. Mom’s done it. Who am I to say don’t do it if I’ve done it, you know? Leading by example, I guess. But I would definitely coach them. I would be almost like a Kris Jenner momager. If that’s the route they want to go on, which I would prefer them not to, but if, whatever my kids do, providing it doesn’t harm them, I am going to support them and guide them the best I can.”
Lisa first shared her life with the world during Season 2 of RHOM, and she reflects on how much life has changed in the decade since it aired.
“Number one, [I’m] a mom. I don’t even know what I was doing before. I was in la-la land. And some people might still think I’m in la-la land, but I’m not. I’m just focused on my kids. I’m focused on being a better person,” she said. “Every day I’m trying to be a better person... just always striving to be my best. And when I was younger, I was kind of going out more and didn’t have too much responsibility. And now I do. So I changed so much. Like, I’m such a homebody now, which is not like the old Lisa... which is great, ’cause if you don’t grow, then what are you doing in life?”
But if Lisa could give some advice to herself back then, this is what she’d tell her: “Maybe just not get in your head so much, not worry so much. Just be yourself at all times,” she said. “So my advice to myself now — and even back then — just to be yourself and not worry so much about what other people think. I mean, we’ve already come this far. Just be yourself. And be who you are. Because people are gonna like you or not. Who cares? Just be yourself, that’s all that matters. It sounds cliche, but it’s the truth.”
Seasons 1 through 4 of RHOM are streaming now on Peacock. You can also catch RHOM Season 4 as it encores on Bravo on Tuesdays at 9:30/8:30c.
