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I Made Kim Kardashian's Wellness Drink in Kris Jenner's Posh Blender — And I'm Doing Amazing, Sweetie
You don't have to be a billionaire to drink your breakfast like one.
For Kris Jenner — world's most famous momager, parent to a 21-year-old billionaire, and grandparent to a gaggle of impossibly posh toddlers — beverages are very important. After all, she starts her packed days at 4:30 am — and bookends them with a pair of critically important drinks.
Meanwhile, her daughter — not the billionaire, but the one with psoriasis, you might have heard of her? — Kim Kardashian swears by a particular drink, too. That would be celery juice; Kim is one of many celebrities outspoken about the ingredient, which she drinks routinely for her skin condition, though she doesn't love the taste.
Well, the kitchen appliance brand Breville sent Kris a bunch of appliances to deck out the new Kylie Cosmetics offices, and included in the batch were some tools to help the whole Kardashian clan mix up the array of ingredients they need for their various conditions. Kris called the lot of Breville appliances "amazing" and "so chic!"
Well, if it's posh enough for the Kardashian-Jenner clan, it's posh enough for me. (And that's a good rule of thumb — so you're welcome.) So, when Breville sent me an appliance of my own, I was eager to keep up with the Kardashians (see what I did there?) and whip up a power beverage at home.
When I first opened my Breville Super Q blender, I noticed it looked not dissimilar to other blenders — chic, streamlined, attractive, but otherwise... a blender.
The real differentiation process came in the actual usage...
I referenced the accompanying recipe book to find a celery-packed green smoothie. And then, as I do with all other recipes, I bailed on it in favor of a version made with things I actually had in the house. I tossed in generous stalks of celery — expecting, naturally, a miracle result — as well as couple of small green apples, several kale leaves, and couple of cups of spinach leaves.
For the liquid, I added coconut water, and for a dash of natural sweetness, I added a frozen banana. (If you're not already freezing bananas that would otherwise have gone bad... you must! It eliminates waste, and then you always have the smoothie ingredient ready to use — plus, it chills your drink to boot.)
Then I hit the button labeled — wait for it — "Green Smoothie." And the thing runs like a Ferrari engine, so powerful and consistent, pulsing at increments to make sure every morsel is blended just so. And the Super Q attachment makes the consistency so creamy, it can be best described as something you'd get in a restaurant, or something that's been food-styled for Instagram — rather than the traditional bubbly, uneven consistency you might be used to at home.
Then it was time to taste. Per Kim — and others, like Vanderpump Rules' Stassi Schroeder who used some colorful language to describe the flavor of celery juice — I was expecting the taste of my concoction to be bad. But I was quite pleasantly surprised. With the addition of the banana and apples, the drink went down easy — actually enough to totally belie just how healthy it is.
Beyond all the nutrients, I was pleased to have made a very palatable drink that's much lower in calories than the homemade smoothies I more typically whip up (say, before I had a blender with a dedicated "Green Smoothie" setting). Made with 40-calorie coconut water, it has far fewer calories than the smoothies I make with milk and yogurt, even low- or non-fat dairy ingredients. I'd put a serving of my first concoction at 150 calories tops — or about half of the calories in my homemade daily dairy smoothies.
And my skin is flawless now!*
*There has been no actual change to the quality of my skin, since I drank my first green smoothie this morning.
However, I do think this could be a game changer: a truly restaurant-quality smoothie (approximate street value in L.A.: $15) with half the calories... and a dose of Kardashian cachet. Frankly, it all just makes me feel like I'm doing amazing, sweetie.
And I'll take it.