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Should You Know All of Your Close Friends’ Friends or Not?
Are you really close friends if you don't?
Kyle Richards claimed she wasn't jealous, but she did hint (pre-Puppy Gate, of course) she was closer friends with Lisa Vanderpump than Dorit and Paul "PK" Kemsley. In fact, Kyle insisted she never even heard of the two until one night during a dinner at Pump, when they “fell from the sky.”
Lisa explained she and PK had mutual friends and the same social circle in Europe and London. She said she didn't know Dorit very well, but she’s grown to love her “because of PK.”
Is it weird if you never really hear about a close friend's close friends?
Relationship expert and author of Dating Again With Courage and Confidence, Fran Greene, says it doesn’t really matter. What matters is your relationship with your friend.
“It may be fun, or interesting to know all of your friend’s friends, but it has no impact on the quality of your relationship with your friend,” she said. “You might think that if you know everyone that your friend associates with, you will actually know your friend better. Your friendships should be based on what happens between you and your friend. Knowing your friend’s friends has no relevance on any of your friendships. Knowing everyone in your friend’s circle could actually make your relationship with your friend complicated.”
Good point.
“Friendships are based on trust, honesty, caring and giving. It’s what friends are for,” Greene adds. “Don’t think that if you know your friend’s friends you will have a better relationship. More than likely knowing everyone might lead to jealousy, mistrust, and tangled webs. Do yourself a favor, focus on your friend, and not who your friend knows.”
Unless you’re on The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. Then by all means, be nosy and jealous and inquire about everybody.