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Cary: No, I'm Not Surprised LeeAnne Was Pissed

"If you didn't want Mark on the couch, honey, then you shouldn’t have had his name in your mouth all season long!"

By Cary Deuber
Is Going Into Your Second Housewives Reunion Easier?

As this season is coming to a close, I truly want to thank everyone for watching us each week. At this point, I can report that I feel more positive than negative. One of the over-arching forces I felt this year was LeeAnne trying to put me on an island, isolating me, and sailing away with her minions. Fortunately, I feel that I weathered the storm and am on solid ground with most of the group…I thinkLeeAnne Locken is very used to "running" a friend group and feeling like the "alpha." I must be so threatening to her that she tried this hard to convince people to not be my friend… And yes, I am well aware that that sounds like 3rd grade - it’s obviously where she lives. Overall, I feel that I was put at the center of some conflicts that in retrospect seem really silly.

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One of those conflicts was about plastic surgery and board certification. I really hope that the audience will be better able to understand where I was coming from. Board certification is a hot topic among the Plastic Surgery community. For someone to make a claim that a physician is a board-certified plastic surgeon when they are not is actually a very big deal, much bigger than just casual social chatter. True plastic surgeons go through 6-8 years of specialty training after medical school, whereas pure cosmetic surgeons can go through 0-2 years after an unrelated residency. I am a patient advocate and above all else, my concern is for patient safety and positive patient outcomes, regardless of who we’re talking about. My intention with all of the plastic surgery talk was purely protective; the negative trash talk was someone else’s agenda, NOT mine. It was so frustrating this year to see that no matter what I said (or DIDN’T say), I was still made out to be so negative by some around me. My buttons were definitely pushed by some of the girls (one in particular) knowing full well what my reaction would be…and they got it.
So that being said, thanks for that life lesson, ladies. It has been an important one for me. With this group, I will in the future treat them as friends only. Not as patients or women seeking medical advice; just as friends, which I guess is what I should have done in the first place: take off my nurse’s hat and put on my friendship hat; NOT offer my professional opinion or medical facts.

The reaction from LeeAnne to my husband coming on set was totally expected. It must be so hard to have to look someone in the eye that you have trashed to America. I can’t imagine saying so many nasty things behind someone’s back, lying directly to their face (at the Sparkle Dog launch), and then having to see them in person. No, I’m not surprised that LeeAnne was pissed. But, how can she say that it’s very one-sided when she heard that Mark was on his way out? Where’s the logic? I’ll tell you what’s one-sided: how she trashed him all year. Thankfully, she’s going to actually get her wish. It’s finally going to be two-sided when she has to face one of her biggest targets, like anyone who acts like a bully should. If you didn't want Mark on the couch, honey, then you shouldn’t have had his name in your mouth all season long! Maybe if you stopped dragging my family into your own personal frustrations, he wouldn’t be so relevant. Ah, irrelevancy, now THAT is something that I think LeeAnne is quite familiar with.

I feel like I have strengthened some of my friendships and weakened others. My relationship withStephanie Hollman is on incredibly solid ground, and I believe that my relationship with Brandi Redmond has grown in a positive direction. Her apology to me was as sincere as they come. I know she has been beating herself up this year, and it has been rough on her. I remain in a good place withKameron Westcott, even though I’m surprised that she is so blindly supportive of LeeAnne (given the pain and the threats LeeAnne sends out all year long). I am surprised thatD'Andra Simmons can ask why I can forgive Brandi and not Leeanne? Well, sister, Brandi is genuinely trying to be sincere in her apology, and she’s shown herself to be a friend much longer than when she hasn’t. Sure, LeeAnne "owns" her bad behavior (whatever that means); but, she continues with it relentlessly and never seems to learn, grow, OR make any effort to do better. What…do you want a prize for NOT actually killing the people you’ve said you wanted to? A trophy for NOT saying more ignorant crap than what you already have? Brandi knows what she did was wrong, and it has changed her as a person. LeeAnne has only become more set in her old ways.

I have made my fair share of missteps and mistakes this year. I am not proud of some of my words and actions, but I have grown from them and know that I will be a better wife, friend, and person because of them.

Get your popcorn ready for next week… I think it’s going to be quite the final show!

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