I Don't Understand Brandi

Hi everyone! Another season here, and another season gone!

This has been a great year, and one of the most amazing experiences I've gone through! I am not ashamed or embarrassed for anything that has happened this season. Of course, I may not have liked everything, and I’m sure I said the wrong thing or made mistakes. But I'm only human, and I have tried very hard to express myself as honestly as I can! Looking back at myself over this last season, I'm amazed at the changes I've seen! Thank you so much for sharing this growth with me, and for being a part of my sobriety! You have all been such a huge part of me overcoming some huge obstacles! I feel as if we have done this together, and I am forever grateful to you! OK, enough about us. You probably want to know about the reunion, so let's get started. . .

I think you all see that my sister Kyle and I are in a great place today. This season, you saw us struggling, and trying to piece our relationship back together, and we've done it! Over Christmas break, we worked on it while we did Stars in Danger, and now we’ve come full circle. At the Reunion Part 2, I just needed to tell her that moving forward, she needs to be more consistent with what she says to me, and that we need to be more upfront with one another. I want her to know I'll always have her back, and I want to know she will always have mine! The last couple years have been very challenging. I love my sister very much, and we’ve overcome these hurdles together. I truly want to thank you for the support you given Kyle and I through these times! We have really felt your support pushing us forward! Thank you!

Lisa and I. . .We’re in a good place today, but I have to be honest it was important for me to point out to Lisa how I felt about Paris! It was already a touchy situation for me, as I had a medication mix-up and I was not feeling well! She could have talked to me! Kyle did. . .Yolanda did. Instead, I felt she spoke behind my back and made light of a situation that was very serious! I saw her make jokes, and it really hurt my feelings and it made me angry. But Lisa and I are friends and I can discuss this with her in a healthy way! It's unfortunate the way it played out. I’m sure Lisa and I will handle things differently in the future, as I care very much for Lisa, and I know she cares for me. As far as my med mix-up, it’s unfortunate, but that's all it was, a medication mix-up, and no one paid the price more than I!

With regards to Brandi. . .Brandi baffles me. I really don't know why she jumped in on my conversation with Yolanda. Yolanda and I were having a discussion that had absolutely nothing to do with her! The next thing I know she's talking about my pillow -- which was really quite mean! When I asked Brandy why, she said she was protecting her friend!

The thing that really confuses me, is she said how I was her friend, and I do believe I am! So WHY!?!  Why be so mean? I guess I don't fully understand her -- like when she said my sister secretly doesn’t want me to make it! I know in my heart Brandi doesn't want that for me, and she knows my sister doesn't want that for me! So WHY? Only Brandi knows! Although, we have these "Brandi" things, I still like Brandi even though she said my pillow smelled like s---! Here's the thing, regardless of what Brandi said.. It's my pillow, so if I want to s--- on my pillow, or wipe my a-- on my pillow, it’s still my pillow! I can do whatever I want with it! What's really SCARY is that Brandi SNIFFED my dirty pillow! It had been dragged all over Europe, so no telling what was on that damn thing!!! So GROSS!

In regards to Yolanda, I guess my biggest issue is with her is just not telling the truth. Sure the girls and I have had our share of disagreements, and in those moments, people have blurted out untrue statements! But they've always been in the middle of a very heated argument! Sometimes they have been hard to forgive! But due the nature of the arguments, and the history of the girls, we have been able to put them behind us and move forward!

But with Yolanda, she creates these unnecessary lies at the expense of others! That raises a big red flag for me! I've seen people lie to make themselves look better, or to cover for their family, but this is for no apparent reason! It really bothers me that Yolanda has gone this route. When Andy asked her about when she called out Taylor, she said she doesn’t even remember saying that, and that she was very sick in her disease and she doesn’t even remember saying those words! She wouldn't even take responsibility! How about "I'm sorry" or "That was wrong"!? Or when she was asked about the master cleanse, why not just say she lied? Or when Andy asked her about the worker at her home who didn't speak English, why did she call him out in front of everyone and on camera? Her excuse is because of her culture and where she’s from. Instead of saying "Yes, that was insensitive" or "Maybe not everybody had access to the schools I did," she backtracks to these excuses rather than just apologizing. It doesn't make you a bad person to say you made a mistake, it just makes you human! I'm an alcoholic in recovery! I try to take responsibility for my actions whenever I can. When things come up that I did or said back when I was drinking, I try to own it. I have apologized for them, and I am still apologizing for them today!

I appreciated the friendship that I thought I had with Yolanda at the beginning, but I guess that was only one side of the person that she is! I recently heard that Yolanda insinuated that Kyle and I are desperate to get camera time! My sisters and I have grown up in front of the camera, so we are hardly desperate for that. We're not the ones leaving a treatment center to attend a reunion show.

On a happier note, I just saw Taylor and her boyfriend the other day and they both look great. I have a good friendship with her today, and I wish Taylor and her family nothing but wonderful and great things!!

To sum it up, I HAD A GREAT YEAR! My sister and I are all good. Lisa and me? Wonderful! Taylor, Brandi, and I? Super! And Yolanda? Well, I don’t think we are meant to be anything more than acquaintances. But all is good. It's been an amazing season and I've learned so much. Thank you so much for growing with me, and for all your incredible support. Thank you for being with me on this amazing journey and being a part of it with me!

XO,
Kim