GIF Recap: Kayaks, Crowns, and Elephants

Pack your bags my friends! We've traveled 900 hours to go to Bali! Bali is pretty much paradise personified, as evidenced by the local choice of headwear.

Lizzie's into it, but are you?

After many many hours of travel (most of which Vicki spent testing the boundaries of international internet). The ladies finally arrived. Vicki attempted to high jack the bus (Speed 3: Turn on the A/C), but eventually the professionals took over and the Housewives hit the hotel.

Heather tried to get the ladies into the spirit with authentic crowns. Vicki resisted ("Guess what? We look like dumb asses!"). She was also really not feeling the idea of a shrimp mousse, as it wedged together two kinds of creatures -- land and sea. Yes, she thought they meant moose. Also she was troubled by it's thumb-like shape. They whipped a shrimp?!?

Someone explain to her where what you want her to eat walks around?!?

Oh hell, she'll eat it anyway.The next morning the ladies were up and ready to take on an excursion -- like a brisk kayak with Vicki and Shannon. Things start out a touch rickety. -- mainly because there was no drink holder in the kayak.

Once things got moving, the ladies got synched up -- until they tried to board a mystery vessel.

Please watch the entire catastrophe again HERE.

But if you thought that touble was going to be the cause of Vicki's most daunting case of motion sickness this trip -- you my friend are wrong.

Somebody pull over -- oh wait a wild dog!

Watch the entire splendid moment now, because you deserve it.

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Now that they've dogdge the wild dog and Vicki vomitting things should be fine. . .

Note Tamra warned her about this about four seconds before.

And now, finally the ladies have boarded their elephants and are on the move.

Despite Vicki's fears about wobbling over, the ladies make it out OK -- a little wet, but OK.

Well OK is a relative term, Tamra's perhaps losing it, based on her belief that when your butt itches good luck is coming your way.

But dinner wasn't all talk of butt itches -- pretty soon talk of the "dumb and dumber" comment came up, and then things turned to Lizzie's birthday party.

Lizzie's casts some shade at Tamra's excuses. 

Lizzie says she's over it, but that hair flip is definitely saying "I'm under it."

Of course, Heather's wants to set the record straight about that comment.

Look at the text. . . and move on. According to Heather a text about a vagina is a "negligible offense."

But there's something more offensive that went on afterwards. Tamra and Lizzie tell conflicting stories about what went down at a nightmare version of "shag, marry, kill" at Heather's Valentine's Day party.

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Uh oh, this is going to make the rest of the trip pretty awkward. . .