Ashley: "I'm Not Jealous of My Mother"

Alright everyone ...here we go! I am going to try my best to keep you updated as much as possible, and maybe settle a few more rumors that are going around! I am going to get down to the nitty-gritty and the most important thing — I am not jealous of my mom, her relationship with George, her new car, her ring, or her happiness! Honestly now, why on God's green earth would I ever try to ruin my own mothers engagement!? It's hard enough finding a decent boyfriend around here when you're my age ...I couldn't even begin to imagine what it would be like for her!! I am very happy for her! Did I say "I hate you" when she got a new car? YES! Do I want a new car? YES. I cannot afford a car like hers and would love to have it as my own ... but that does not mean that I actually hate her and wished that she didn't get it!

And no, I didn't flinch when my mom got her new ring. I think it is beautiful, thanks to Barbara Parker!! That day at Vicki's house was the first time I had seen my mom since she and the camera crew decided to stroll into my house un-announced and barge in on me in the shower. I was very emotional, and did not feel like being fake! So pardon me for not showing a more excited reaction, but at that point I could not have cared less. Yes I looked like a bitch, but hey I was pissed. So basically me being jealous of my mom does not exist!! I love her and everyone should understand that by now. End of story!

Some are curious about my dad, and where he stands in the picture. My dad has always lived down in San Diego with my step-mom and two sisters. My dad is my other half, my hero! I love him oh so much! There really isn't much to say other than the fact that he is like the sole reason why I am sane! I always run to him for advice, and if he thinks I am being an idiot, he will tell me and put me in my place! He makes me organize my life, pay attention to my bills, and makes sure that I am always being true to myself! He would and has done everything for me! I have a different dad than Sophia and Josh, and even Sophia adores my dad!!! Mary, Ellie, and Demi I love you guys tooooo!

As far as my brother I will say what my mother has said: Without going into detail, I would like anyone compelled to do so, to please pray for Josh. I have always believed in the power of prayer — the more the better. Please ask for his safety and that he be given the power to accept responsibility, handle the consequences with grace and have the ability to change. I know a lot of you think you have the answers to all of our or his problems, but you can never ever know what it is like unless you have lived OUR situation first hand! My mom has been the only person there for Josh throughout his difficulties, and the only person left to be mad at.

I know a few out there think I am a selfish, spoiled brat. I have been fortunate enough to grow up with such a lavish lifestyle. But honestly, I don't have half of the things that Kara, Shane, Brianna, Lindsey or Mike has. I am 100% fine with that! I would like you all to know that I have had a job since I was 15! Not because I had to, but because I wanted to. I wanted to know what it was like to work hard and earn my own money and I have ever since! My life has always been more gratifying when things were simple! But lets face it, my life is now anything but simple!!!

Yes, my mom and dad have helped me out a lot since then, but I am thankful, not ashamed! I pay all my own bills, and yes I still live in the townhouse ...and it is very clean! I am very glad that my mom has given me the opportunity to live there! Editing made me look like a slob but I am actually a clean freak, the carpets have to have straight vacuum lines in it, right down to my closet being color coordinated!!

Right now I am working on paying off MY car that is in MY name. Hopefully within the next year I will be driving a new car of my own. I am working a beautiful 9-5, Monday-Friday job. And it actually isn't as bad as I thought it would be! I am on a schedule now! OC Energy Drink is kicking butt, and you can check it out if you want on the website www.ocenergydrink.com! No more going out and partying late on weekdays, no more sleeping in past 8am! I am not a "typical blonde Orange County girl, floating through life." I have many goals and life ambitions ...and I plan to pursue every one of them! I am majoring in broadcast journalism and would love to have a career in the broadcasting field.

This past January, I won Miss Supercross of Anaheim 2 and am currently in the running for Miss Supercross 2008. If I win, the exposure could help me with my dream of sports broadcasting!!! Please help out and vote for me on the Supercross website. I have been through a lot in life and I see the world much different than most people my age! This has made me a strong, determined, ambitious young woman and I know exactly what I want, despite what you may see on TV.

I love Orange County, but I would love to travel and experience different cultures! I have been given so much in life I would love to give back ...visiting poverty-stricken countries and helping out as much as I could has always been a passion of mine! I admire all of Angelina Jolie's time she has spent helping others and would love to do something along the same lines!

If you really had the chance to sit down and get to know me, I think that you might be surprised! Yes I am still growing up and dealing with my daily struggles but honestly, I'm just the girl next door but with a little more attitude! If you live in Orange County you need a little attitude or else you get walked all over by those who want to take advantage of you!! I want to be remembered as the girl who always smiles even if I'm in a bad mood, and the one that could always brighten up somebody's day even if I couldn't brighten up my own.

People have been saying that my goals are most likely not realistic, so I wrote them down and here are the ones I have come up with, though they are not in any specific order — to lead an adventurous life, be fully organized, exercise daily, fall in love, get married, never get divorced, win a marathon, have fun every day of my life, eat a hot dog at a baseball game, bring more light, love, laughter and loveliness to the world, stay in touch with people, feel more in control over my life, stay up on current events, to never let my FUTURE kids think I'm "un-cool," to be more involved in politics, to fill a journal with quotes and images that inspire me and pass it onto my family, to be a good mother, read the top 100 novels of all time, pay for the car behind me on the toll road, pick a destination after arriving at an airport, buy a house, to make sure my family always knows how much I love them every day of my life! To get rid of all the junk, and keep what's most important in life, to stop procrastinating, and to always help people in need. I hope this has given you a chance to know a little more about me! Thank you for watching the show! And thank you so much for all of the kind comments and support! You guys are awesome!

Xoxo, Ashley Zarlin P.S. Don't forget to vote!