After returning from the racetrack with an axe to grind (watch her full rant to the other Housewives HERE), Sonja was still feeling left behind. And so she attempted to storm out and off to the Hamptons. But like a phoenix rising from some over-served ashes, Sonja returned to the house and to the ladies.
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Once Sonja was back the straw could really start stirring the drink -- which meant lots of drinking and dancing. Watch the "quad-polar" Sonja go from zero to 100 in two seconds flat again HERE.
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Meanwhile back in NYC, Ramona is trying to get Avery fully prepared for college and that means driving lessons. After some struggles to identify the brake, Avery was mostly a natural. Minus when she YOLO-ed that parallel parking job the second time. . .but that was just a love tap.
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LuAnn was hosting a charity luncheon for Look Good, Feel Better. Besides just delicious lunch, she'll be auctioning off some beautiful dresses modeled by Kristen and a secret guest!
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While gabbing with the girls about George's engagement party, Aviva spies a familiar face -- a familiar face George might have had relations with.
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According to George, he, Cody and former Miss USA Nana Meriweather once spent the night together. Awkward. . .
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As the fashion show continued, Aviva couldn't help but be distracted by the salacious story of her dad and Miss USA, and so she decided to let Heather in on the backstory with a clandestine text.
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Heather was tickled by this bit of information (even if it was delivered in the middle of Bonnie's speech). We just wonder what emojis Aviva included.
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Not one to be left out, Ramona wants to know what's so "f---ing funny," and so the light lunch reading gets passed around, with Aviva's blessing.
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LuAnn's none-too-pleased by the distraction on the other side of the room. What could be so funny that the ladies can't manage to pay attention. Where are their manners?
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LuAnn's surprise guest is revealed -- it's Kelly! Did you miss our favorite gummy bear? Did you too want to bid on the long dress she was sporting? If so you'll have to fight Carole and Aviva for it!
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Ramona's not really that excited to see Kelly again. "Special guest? I don't understand what's so special about Kelly."
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Ramona had to get to the bottom of those ménage à trois rumors, so she decided to go right to the source. After fact-checking with Miss USA it seems like someone is fibbing -- but is it her or George?
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Don't underestimate the investigative powers of Ramona Singer. She will crack any case.
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Nana looks shocked by the revelation that George is telling folks they had a threesome. Ramona buys her story, "Let's face it, why would the ex-Miss USA ever be with George? She's gorgeous beyond words and he's a creepy leech."
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Sonja invites Kristen over for a facial and some girl times. . .So Kristen strolls on over that morning.
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But Pickles has some news -- Lady Morgan isn't home -- and hasn't been since she went out the night before.
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Kristen can't believe Pickles isn't more concerned. Sonja could be in ditch right now! Her phone isn't even on! But Sonja's in no ditch. She was juts having a little walk-of-shame/victory lap from the night prior. Watch her return from her sleepover HERE.
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Sonja was just at this place called "Jaime's." And by this place she means Jaime's apartment -- a hotspot she hopes to visit again.
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Satako has been part of Sonja's life for 15-20 years, so of course she knows who Sonja's hooking up with, like Tomas from St. Barth's. And Satako claims she knows who LuAnn is hooking up with too ("I heard her favorite is short French men.").
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After deciding that LuAnn likes short men because she likes to be in charge, the ladies focus on Sonja (who needs to turn her face around for her next potential suitor). That leads to the topic of Sonja's former suitors -- which might include Carole's former boyfriend Russ. Yup, Sonja's making that canary in the coal mine face because she accidentally stole her ex-boyfriend. Watch that shocking bit of intel get revealed again HERE.
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Kristen's shocked and doesn't quite believe it. But, because she's bound by the duties of being a good girlfriend -- and by the duty of sharing hilarious gossip -- she has to share this and tales of LuAnn's proclivity for short French dudes with the girls.
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And so the ladies gather to talk about Aviva sharing her dad's sexcapades and the intel Satiko shared over placenta facials.
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LuAnn gets a good chuckle out of that one at first, but there's nothing small about Jacques and she certainly isn't cheating on him. Carole doesn't believe that Russ and Sonja hooked up -- she thinks Sonja's just trying to get attention. At least they can all agree on one thing: Kristen's skin looks great!
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In their continued quest to get Avery ready for college, the ladies try to do some shopping. But Avery's got some expensive taste -- no Missoni pillows for the dorm. And no mom sleepovers allowed, according to Avery's face.
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Aviva decides the host the ladies for a party to help her place some of her new artwork. There's even a piece from LuAnn's daughter. We're loving the salon vibe of the Drescher abode, even if there's no Elvis pieces for Kristen to admire.
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Ramona attempted to make a quick exit before things got too dramatic. Lord knows the last time she was at Aviva's things didn't go especially well.
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LuAnn hadn't understood all the Aviva troubles -- until now. She's ready to address the issues from the ladies' lunch. So LuAnn gets right into it: Did Aviva invite Miss USA to her charity event?
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Aviva denies inviting Miss USA and won't let LuAnn call her a liar -- plus she wants to know where that dress she bought is. Aviva also won't be held responsible for her father's actions, particularly when she thinks LuAnn's daughter's art is all about sex as well. Watch LuAnn and Aviva face-off again HERE.
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Despite all of the women weighing in, there was no resolution. But at least we can agree that it's for the best that LuAnn didn't see the text at the luncheon because she "would have vomited up my salad."
