Lea's Hurtful Digs

“When restraint and courtesy are added to strength, the latter becomes irresistible.” -Mahatma Gandhi

“The boredom occasioned by too much restraint is always preferable to that produced by uncontrolled enthusiasm.” -Osbert Lancaster

So what have we learned after this fifth week in reality land? That drama and restraint make strange bedfellows. That reality begets drama and that much of the real conflict, perceived conflict, and impending conflict could be avoided by exercising a little, you guessed it, restraint. But if we all exercised anything but unbridled enthusiasm, would you still tune in? 

I have never been one to defend my words or actions.  I am quite comfortable with how things have played out so far because “at the end of the day” it’s reality: mine, theirs, and yes, even yours. And as I have painfully discovered, the camera does not lie. If you choose to spend any part of your Thursday nights with me, know that you are sharing it with the most authentic version of me. I don’t play up or “down play” any particular situation. My reactions are as uncensored and unfiltered as they are in my everyday life, and just like in my everyday life, if I deem that my behavior requires that I apologize for it, I will.

Cooking with Joanna was a nice way to spend an afternoon. I like that she confided in me, and hope that I was able to provide some insight into the issues she is facing with Romain; and while I can’t be sure that I offered much enlightenment,  she did learn how to make a mean white truffle and mushroom risotto! Check out the recipe at AnaQuincoces.com.The Hearts and Stars Gala was a great event, and I am glad that Lisa is doing her part for this charitable organization as well as others. Lisa is a very generous person, and I am happy to see her giving back to the community. To call what Lisa is doing “cute” is to give it less credence than it deserves, but that’s just me. Lea has the uncanny ability to make an “innocent comment” sound like a dig. Even when she claims something is a “joke” it is always so gratuitously hurtful (i.e. greencard) that it is impossible to join in her borderline sinister/hysterical laughter. The sheer number of insults disguised as jokes that she follows with “uproarious laughter” as someone recently commented, is off putting in every way. If you study Lea closely, you will see that at one point or another she mocks and belittles everyone (even those who she has now decided are weak enough to be allies).  She plays all sides against the middle, and she does it rather brilliantly -- I’ll give her that. As the season progresses you will see that her relationships are in a constant state of evolution; note that I am not one of the pawns in her elaborate socialite chess game.  I am merely a mildly amused observer. Checkmate.

I was noticeably uneasy at the gala. The Rodolfo/Karent situation has escalated far beyond what is necessary and having to partake in an evening with them was quite uncomfortable. Because of this, I made every effort to avoid eye contact, physical proximity, and ultimately conflict with either one of them. It is unfortunate that Karent behaves in such an overzealous manner.  Be it in her personal life with Rodolfo and the reptilian PDA with which she convinces everyone that they are a couple, or with friends like Thomas Kramer, who despite Karent’s personal claim, acknowledges that he has been friends with the other ladies for decades. Her behavior always seems desperate and exaggerated, not unlike that of the protagonist in a real life telenovela.  Frankly, I don’t know this TK guy from a hole in the wall, and I can’t say I care to; but apparently it is imperative to Karent that we all know that they are “dear friends,” that he “wishes he could date her,” and that there is a lot of photographic evidence regarding the same. OK, noted.  LOUD AND CLEAR.

I went to visit Alexia the afternoon of the Venue event, because I knew she was a bit nervous about it. She had been out of the loop after Frankie’s accident, and the prospect of a big event like this one was daunting. I wanted to show my support and reassure her, sinceI was certain the event would go off without a hitch. A peek into next week’s episode confirms that Alexia’s nervousness was not misplaced. I was a little surprised to hear that Karent had contacted Alexia’s designer friend to ask her to borrow clothes. I don’t think Karent is a bad person, and limited contact with her has led me to the conclusion that she is for the most part well intentioned. But man does she lack decorum! I don’t claim to know how to behave in any given situation, but to mess up every single time without fail is a less than stellar record and warrants a closer look.  A much closer look.

“Facebook stalking” with my girls was all in good fun, but just for the record: I disagree with the “one boob bigger” comment. In fact, Karent’s boobs look pretty normal to me.  I always tell my girls that they DO NOT need to express every single random thought they have out loud. I especially have a problem with discussing physical characteristics or flaws because A) no one is perfect (especially me) and B) it is tacky. But it is hard to encourage girls to be independent thinkers and then attempt to sensor what they say. So like every other mom on the planet, I have accepted that there is no instruction manual for parenting and I continue to do the best I can with the experience I’ve acquired. My current plan is to convince them that restraint is the new black.

While I hate to end this blog with something as trivial as the symmetry of breasts, I have learned to recognize when a healthy dose of restraint is in order.

Till next time!
Ana

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