Cary: Titles Don't Matter, Honesty Does

I’d like to believe that I am a good friend.

I think that means:
You’ll be there to support a friend during tough times;
You’ll call them out when they’re being unreasonable;
You’ll let them know when people are talking crap about them;
You’ll try your best to keep the peace;
You try to admit when you’re wrong

Obviously, I can’t always meet all of these criteria, but I try my best. In a group of six strong, independent and different women, it can get messy.

Name calling is not nice; however, my intention when I sat down with Kameron Westcott was to make her realize confrontation by badgering is ineffective. The issues are usually just not that deep, the badgering is frustrating and comes off as annoying. Kam and I have been friends for years and I care about her. If I didn’t, I would have ignored the entire fight between her, Brandi Redmond andStephanie Hollman. Making mountains out of molehills does not help friendships. Brandi adopted a baby which is an incredible gift. Any way she chooses to share that (or keep it private) should be accepted. Stephanie got heated in defense of her friend and I don’t blame her. Maybe the Deuberitas should also take some blame.

On to LeeAnne Locken and the ‘why haven’t you set a date yet’ deal. I really just care about a friend’s happiness, not their marital status. In my heart of hearts I want LeeAnne to be happy. Marriage may be a part of that, but I don’t believe it’s the be all or end all. I’ve been through divorce, so I understand LeeAnne’s fear of failing. It’s a scary thing. I served a role in torpedoing a past relationship or two... whether due to unhappiness or fear. And, I’ve also had a relationship blow up in the past due to someone else’s fear.

LeeAnne doesn’t deserve to be attacked over her fears. She and Rich deserve all the time they need to wrap their heads around marriage. She deserves to feel supported and if she needs to talk... I’m here.

But, who’s the queen of the group!?! Who really gives a crap!!! I personally COULD NOT CARE LESS… I’m not into competing with friends. I prefer to compete with myself. For me, that creates drive and helps me achieve my goals. D'Andra Simmons is obviously very into the queen thing, so let her have it. Titles don’t matter. Honesty does.

I’m going to try to continue being the friend each of these girls needs.