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Getting a Nice Guy for Rachel Uchitel

Patti teaches Rachel to ditch the uber aggressive macho men and helps tough teddy Steve go for the beauty inside.

By Patti Stanger

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Read Patti's full transcript after the jump!

OK, this was a doozy of a week. My first client was Steve Lobel. Steve’s a tough guy from Brooklyn who made his money managing and producing rap artists. In fact, Steve even got me to rap a little bit this week, and I have to say -- I wasn’t that bad!

The first time he came to me, he picked a great girl and I thought everything was perfect. But a couple of months later he told me that, you know they went in separate directions. He decided she was a little too young, shocker!

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My other client was Rachel Uchitel, who I know from New York from years ago. Her true love fiancé died in 9/11. She’s dated since then and had her ups and downs. She used to run expensive clubs in New York. Since then, she’s had a daughter and parted ways with her ex-husband, and she’s turning to me for help.

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Look I know Rachel, so I know what she needs. She usually picks uber-aggressive guys, macho guys, and then she locks horns with them because she’s much more successful than they are. She’s what I call a shredder. She’s got an aggressive personality. She needs to open herself up and determine that it’s OK to be with a guy that treats her well, that’s nice, and that they don’t need to be domineering to be confident and strong. That’s what I think. I’m going to do my best to get her to think the same thing.

So because Steve’s a little picky, I decided to go with my two-way mirror for recruiting. That’s where the millionaire actually gets to watch as I go through perspective dates and he gets to chime in and get me to ask them questions. I thought this would be better than letting Steve out in to a mixer again to hold court. I think it was a good idea. Steve also brought his dad out from New York. So it was me, Justin, David, Dad, trying to find a perfect girl for Steve. In the end, I was down to two girls. I thought Steve should go with Masika. But Steve and his dad both picked Allie. Probably because of her giant. . . ‘personality’. No she was great, and cute, and there was nothing wrong with her. But I didn’t think she was as mature as Masika for Steve.

Rachel comes in, and I start meeting guys, and I every time I go back in to the other room, she’s shredding through them. This one’s too this, and this one’s too that, so I talk to her and I try to get some of the nice guys in front of her. Look, maybe I won’t set her up with mister kingdom come, but at least she can see that a nice guy with confidence has a place in her life. She deserves a guy who treats her well and respects her.

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In the end, she chooses Brandon. Brandon’s great. He’s nice, he’s confident, handsome. He’s just the kind of guy Rachel would never have chosen on her own. I’m just so happy she’s trying him. Even if they don’t end up together forever, at least she can see what it’s like to have a good guy on a date. 

So Steve plans a date that shows his tough and teddy bear side. He takes her shooting for the first part of the date -- not for everybody -- but she seems to really enjoy it. Then he takes her on a great romantic gondola ride with a picnic basket. I think he really wanted to show her his softer side. And Allie had a great time, but here’s what’s interesting: by the end Steve says he wasn’t going to ask her out again. Not because she wasn’t great, but because he wanted someone more his equal, as in the same place in the same time.

He should’ve listened to me. Masika was a better choice for him. But here’s the important thing: Steve is learning not to just go for the booty, but to find the girl inside. I think Steve has come a long way and is learning to be picky not just about girls’ looks but about what’s under the hood of the car as well.

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