In Da Club

I’ve seen nightclubs transform otherwise intelligent grown men into children. Forget the booze and the loud music. It’s the environment. The black lights, the neon, the mirrors, the chrome, the velvet-upholstered sofas, the crystal -- for some reason, this type of excess lavishness seems to bring out our most basic primordial instincts. 

Throughout my 20s, I probably spent a couple dozen evenings in nightclubs with my friends. And without fail, a couple guys would inevitably devolve into children and humiliate themselves. I’ll spare you the details, but the nightclub always seemed to bring out their inner 6-year-old. So this begs the question -- if the nightclub environment inspires grown men to act like uncontrollable 6-year old children, how would it impact an actual 6-year old? Clearly, you can’t bring a child to a nightclub (Rosie can confirm this for me). But you can bring the nightclub to the child. Just ask Jessica and Carlo.

As you may have noticed, Jessica and Carlo built a gorgeous home/nightclub (if you missed it the first time around, check it out on the encore showings of Pregnant in Heels) that would make Steve Wynn envious. From the chrome, to the mirrors, to the velvet --they nailed the nightclub vibe to a tee. Replace the booze and loud music with a mountain of toys and multiple miniature electric European sports cars, and you’ve created a nightclub paradise for little Leah.

Here’s the downside to home-gone-nightclub: When an otherwise adorable and precocious 6-year old (like Leah) grows up in a nightclub environment, she may, at times, take on the traits of a crazed 28-year-old man who is acting like a 6-year old at a nightclub. Take another look at the black-and-white guerilla-style surveillance video of Leah if you need a better explanation.  The footage brought me back to my nightclub days. Leah looked about as controllable as one of my unfortunate buddies on an amped-up, black-lit nightclub dance floor.

The good news is that Leah has so much potential, has a great support network around her and has proven that she can overcome any challenge (Rosie clearly challenged her). My friends? Well, the jury is still out.