Cary Deuber: I'm Pissed About Mark's Behavior

Welcome back, friends! Another week, another fun episode…

NOT!!! More like the good, the bad, and the ugly!

So the good first:

The dinner at our house with Kameron Westcott and Court tasted good! Really good food and really great company!! Unfortunately, that’s all I got that was good.

The bad:

I’m pissed about Mark’s behavior, and so is he. Dinner with Court and Kam was a long time coming. The problem is, Mark always looks forward to intimate dinners like that to sharpen his chef skills and make our house guests feel special. There’s a lot he needs to chill out about, and it could probably start right here. It was supposed to be all-grown-ups thing, but at the last minute, I decided to keep Zuri because I WANTED MORE ZURZUR time! I could have let Mark know sooner or had Kam and Court bring their kids too, but who cares if she’s a distraction for everyone? She’s 4 :)

Mark didn’t need to be so visibly annoyed that night. Everyone has it in them to be an ass; like most surgeons, Mark is an expert! This year has been tough, especially with adjusting our roles and how we allocate our time. You saw a REAL really bad moment for us adjusting to those changes. Honestly, life happens to all of us. Most married couples will get it; you work through life’s struggles, and you grow, hopefully getting closer and stronger with each step. But make no mistake — there are plenty of road bumps and hiccups along the way. I’ve never been afraid to discuss how I feel with my husband, and I’m glad to be a Real Housewife with a real backbone and real opinions. We may not always agree, but we ALWAYS try our best to do the right thing for ourselves and our family. Fortunately, I always have confidence that Mark truly does love me, Zuri, and his older kids more than anything in this world. We can both agree that we could use some improvements in the behavior department from time to time.

NOW, for the ugly:

D’Andra Simmons’ Honest Tea was an epic eye-roller for me. LeeAnne Locken said I was a condescending c-word. Hmm…

Let’s be real. I sure as hell am frustrated. LeeAnne, I’ve really tried to give you a chance. At Mark’s birthday, I thought we had a grown-up conversation about our relationship; we made a point of saying we need to voice issues directly to each other to clear the air before creating a mess. But, you showed up at Stephanie Hollman’s party dressed to mock her, and even then, all I said that night to you was "be nice." Meanwhile, when D’Andra calls you out, you’re all about how she’s right. You meet me at the lake talking about how we need to get into Stephanie and Brandi Redmond’s feud, and I basically said they’re big girls and need to work it out themselves. I thought we were trying to get to a better place. WE BOTH SAID THERE NEEDS TO BE NO MORE BEHIND-THE-BACK TALK!

Is that what’s really happening, though? How much honesty is there really at this so-called “Honest Tea?”

Who has a friend show up at an event saying that I would make him look like a monster? Check his Twitter — very different message. Did you come to me with that? Did you defend me? No, you laughed and called me a “c---.” Just the first time this week, by the way. I wonder how many more times you said it when the cameras weren’t rolling…

Another friend shows up to supposedly tell Brandi a rumor about my husband’s sexuality. Did you say, “No, I know Mark, that’s not true?” Nope, you said, "There you go." Thanks, friend. Maybe I need start using air quotes like you do at D’Andra’s tea when you refer to me as a "registered nurse." You know what? It wasn’t an "education." I actually worked hard to go to school, study, and earn my degree. And I actually do understand about board certification, licensing, and oversight of doctors here in America. I’d rather people (friends or not) know exactly what they’re getting into instead of putting themselves at risk with something as serious as surgery. Even my worst enemy deserves a heads up when one’s health or life is in the balance. Doesn’t make me smarter or higher than — just voicing facts. Here’s the link to look up any doctor in Texas — training, credentials, real board certification, complaints and disciplinary action: www.tmb.state.tx.us/page/look-up-a-license

But, back to your behind the scene set-ups. Last year, one of your friends even asked me to perform a sex act on a food item. And you loved it!!! So yeah, it’s becoming obvious to all of us that you have little birds flying around Dallas spreading rumors about the Deubers. These things that seemingly happen at random always have a common denominator with two faces. Need to sitr things up? Bring in a friend to drop a new "fact" (I know, I'm getting the air quotes thing down now!), act surprised, then start spreading it around. Honestly, it happens so often that we can call that “Plan A” for simplicity.

And then you call me a condescending “c---.” That’s “Plan B” by the way: get really nasty and dirty to get a reaction. We all saw you do it to Stephanie at the Halloween party. Now it’s my turn again. I can’t wait to see what’s next. I bet “Plan C” is right around the corner…when nothing else works, play the victim card. Let’s wait for it. It’s coming…

You can give such an inspirational talk about overcoming obstacles. It’s great, then in the VERY next moment, you implicitly call your enemy (me) a vulgar name and laugh at me with a friend. D’Andra calls you out about it AGAIN. Does it register? Nope. And you say the reason we’re not friends is that I never gave you a chance to get to know you…

The person who dreams of getting engaged and finally gets her wish, that person takes so much pleasure in attacking someone else’s life and relationship with rumors and innuendo. Would YOU want to be friends with that person?

Am I coming off as being condescending? Frankly, I believe we’re ALL getting sick of it! With what I’ve dealt with, hopefully, I’ve earned that right. Can anyone honestly blame me? How should I try to OVERCOME? I guess she left that part out of her speech…

I’m already not looking forward to Mexico…

Get a sneak peek at next week's episode now:

Next on #RHOD: LeeAnne Goes Under the Knife