Patti's assertion of the kind of celebrity millionaire Daniel could get: "Maybe fat Jessica Simpson, but not Blake Lively."
Patti's assertion of the kind of celebrity millionaire Daniel could get: "Maybe fat Jessica Simpson, but not Blake Lively."
9608571
On Daniel: ""I wouldn't sleep with you. I wouldn't give you a blow job either."
On Daniel: "I wouldn't sleep with you. I wouldn't give you a blow job either."
9606101
In 2011 a woman can be domesticated, still have a job, and still come home and give you a BJ at the end of the day."In 2011 a woman can be domesticated, still have a job, and still come home and give you a BJ at the end of the day."
9603466
On returning to California: "Look at all the blondes we’re back in LA!"
9608651
On dealing with children or men: "You just gotta give them a toy and they calm down, or food, or a breast."
9603536
On Gary's multiple personalities: "Like did he really think he can fool me? I'm the Millionaire Matchmaker. I have seen it all. I'm CSI."
9603546
On hard liquor: "You drink tequila you get babies."
9606151
Patti: No sex without. . .
Ladies: Condoms!
Patti: Monogamy!
9606131
"I can't make two people carry out my rules and regulations. I am not the Gestapo police of love."
9612186
Patti on obesity: "Let's be real, you’re in the stages for obesity."
9612191
"I'm kinda shell-shocked, like 'Whut?' But he's kinda right. I need to start dating."
9612196
Guest Pattism from Pat Allen -- "Men fall in love with virtues, not vaginas!"
9615571
Patti, on her first double-gay mixer: "So hopefully swords will not cross"
9615576
On making men take their shirts off: "I like to see the slip 'n slides in person."
9615581
"And honey that red and blonde mixture -- I want it gone."
9618901
Patti: "First impressions as I watch Frank's DVD -- kind of an asshole."
9618906
Guest Pattism from life coach Matt Bennett: "When it comes to relationships, I'm telling you something: you are cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs."
9618911
"If Emma wanted to be set up with a rockstar it'd be perfect, a match made in heaven. They always date the trash."
9621231
Patti on the psychic's prediction that she'll meet her match in 2012: "2012, that’s a long way away."
9621236
Patti, wondering about Gary's ideal celebrity crush choice: "He hasn’t seen Jessica Simpson lately."
9621241
On this episode's challenge: "Bibles and boobies that's what we got"
9625136
Patti, on retaining some mystery: "Just reveal it slowly. Let the wine breathe."
9625141
"I don't want to see any of this shabby chic, wedding, boho. . .any of this crap."
9625146
"You know what? Eat me."
9630831
On David's date: "What did you do that was stupid?"
9630841
"How much crack are you on right now? I'm serious"
9630871
"The only way to see if a picker’s working is to throw a train wreck into the mix. Enter Annah. I'm going to test Abe to see if he’d still pick the wrong woman – like Annah, who's crazy as crack."
9639491
On dating younger men: "I can't date you. I'm not Mrs. Robinson."
9639501
"Pecks are for birds. Nobody wants to marry a bird"
9639516
On creating cleavage: "Wear a f--kin' bra, and don't come in to my house in a nappy, napsack."
9642406
Patti on Jason: "Come on! You're 36, and you've never been in love, and you look like that, and you have money. There's something wrong with you."
9642411
"Let's say you had all the money in the world: Do you want you, or do you want the buff guy at the gym?"
9645321
Patti on this client's hair: "Are you a man? Are you a woman? Are you a mouse?"
9645326
"You always have to add seven more years on for the Europeans because they're much more educated and refined."
9645331
Bonus assessment from Marcellus Wiley, on 58-year-old and never married Michael Leslie, who is now ready for marriage: "It wasn't time five years ago? It wasn't time when you turned 50?"
