Love It or Hate It

This past Sunday it seems I was the center of most of the drama. I don’t even know where to begin. Let me just start by saying that I’m a very opinionated person.  I say how I feel regardless of whether you like it or not. The same thing I say when you’re not around is the same thing I’ll say when you’re standing right there, unlike some of the other people in our circle.

Let me start with my comments about Marlo. I think for the most part Marlo is a nice person, and yes, I think she’s fashionable, but I just don’t like being around people who constantly boast and brag about what they have. It comes off as shallow and materialistic. At a certain point people will only notice you for what they can see on the surface, if that’s all you seem to have to offer. When we were having a good time in Marlo’s room, that was the first time I felt like she was relaxed, having a good time, and just being herself. I wanted to be upfront about my previous judgments of her, just so that she would know where I was coming from and hopefully respect the fact that I was never fake with her. I hate when NeNe says that I’m mad just because I let it be known that I don’t like Marlo’s bragging. Now when I remind NeNe that she has made similar statements about Kim, she says it’s because Kim is materialistic and superficial but Marlo doesn’t seem that way. Huh?!  Well anyway, I think Marlo has an incredible closet full of beautiful clothes and shoes, but the constant talk about them I can do without.

OK, now I’m not the only person who was annoyed by Marlo’s bragging. It just seems I was the only one who was upfront about it. Sheree and Phaedra weren’t feeling it either, but they don’t really hang out with Marlo, so I guess they didn’t feel the need to clear the air on their opinions. Now Cynthia on the other hand does hang out with Marlo from time to time, because of NeNe I suppose.  It threw me for a loop when she was so open on the safari about her thoughts of Marlo when it was just us Smalls listening, but she TOTALLY changed her tune when NeNe met up with us. If she has ever wondered why people have said she follows NeNe and doesn’t have her own mind, then maybe she gets it now. I didn’t get it. Why wasn’t she as honest with NeNe about her opinion as she was with us? That was crazy.

So on to my dispute with Sheree. First off, I do not think Kim would have gone to Africa, even if she hadn’t just had the baby, and I don’t see her spending time at an orphanage, especially not the one we went to in Africa. I said it then and I said it to Kim when we discussed it later (which you will see on next week’s episode), AND I STILL SAY IT NOW.  That’s my opinion, but I wasn’t trying to diss Kim by saying that. It caught me off guard when Sheree first asked Kim, “If you could have come, would you have come? Because Kandi didn’t seem to think you would have come. Hours had passed since that conversation in the car, and Sheree never once said anything to me to make me feel like I said anything inappropriate until that moment. But even then it didn’t bother me, because I did say I didn’t think she would come. I just responded by saying , “I didn’t see you hanging out in Africa, especially with people you weren’t really getting along with,” which is true. But then Sheree comes back with, “No, it wasn’t that. You said you didn’t see Kim at an orphanage holding little black kids.” That pissed me off.  I knew I didn’t say anything about Kim not holding little black kids. She totally twisted my words. To say that would imply that I thought Kim was racist, and I do not think Kim is racist.  I let my daughter spend the night with her on multiple occasions. I’ve taken family trips with her off camera. I wouldn’t do that with someone I thought was a racist. It irritated me so much,  because Kim and I already had not been hanging out or talking as much as we used to for the past year, so we definitely did not need any extra drama. Especially over something I didn’t say.

I know that Kim wouldn’t have gone on that trip, because she has been avoiding NeNe for over a year. It would have taken a million dollars to get her to come on a trip where she was stuck for a whole week in close proximity to NeNe. On top of that she hates long flights. She always says she’s claustrophobic. Kim won’t even get on an elevator. She always takes stairs and gets rooms on lower floors, so I don’t see her on the 18-hour flight it takes to get there. As for me saying I don’t see her at the orphanage, no, I don’t. She may disagree, but that’s my opinion. Kim claims to be a germaphobe. The orphanage didn’t have any soap, the water wasn’t really running, and you could smell a strong urine scent, because a lot of the kids’ diapers had not been changed. I just don’t see her being the type to be there. Not that Kim wouldn’t help. I think she would help with giving donations to get them what they need, but I don’t see her doing physical help. In my mind, saying these things is not me talking badly about Kim, it’s me being realistic about Kim. We all have friends that we know may be good for some things, but not good for other things. When I made my comments on the safari, Phaedra was laughing. She didn’t seem to think I said anything bad. Sheree even agreed that Kim wouldn’t want to come with all the tension between her and NeNe. So it through me for a loop when she made it seem like I didn’t think Kim would want to be in Africa because she didn’t want to hold black babies. Crazy!

OK let me move on. NeNe was killing me with this whole “Kim is the Smalls’ boss” mess. No one in the Smalls leads the other. We all have our own opinions and are not easily influenced. She also says that we think she is the leader of the Talls, and that they do what she says. Well I don’t think she’s the leader of the Talls, because I do not think that Marlo follows her, but after watching this last episode, I might agree she’s the leader of Cynthia. Well let me use a better choice of words, because everyone is so sensitive in this bunch. She may not lead Cynthia, but she definitely seems to influence Cynthia. Cynthia said that the Smalls seem nicer when NeNe isn’t around, but I think it’s just that when NeNe is not there, Cynthia is more open with us.

I’ll end on this. I meant what I said at the table. I’m a BOSS, and I follow no one. Love it or hate it!

Much Love,
Kandi

P.S. Please follow me on Twitter @Kandi.
Check out my sites www.BedroomKandi.com and www.KandiKoatedEnt.com.
Mark your calendars for March 4th, because The Kandi Factory will air on Bravo! I’m so excited!